~thebluelagoon

It's necessary (obligatoire) to pass to the next level, in which you will be attacked by German shepherds. Yes, again. Except this time they will have the air of a carrot.

The cunning swine...

Life continues much as it has, unabated, for quite some while. I expect it to keep doing this, otherwise there will be trouble.

The dark and bitter side of this 'life', if that is it's real name which I very much doubt, has been somewhat sweetened by the wonders of Mocktails and Milo, and the fact that we managed to make a profit of about a dollar even without me pretending to be an apple.

An apple advertising something with apple juice is technically caniballism though, and I wouldn't want to put my apple side through that. She's socially confused as it is.

Apples have a very hard time, you know. Red Vs Green.

I, on the other hand, am not confused, even when being attacked by various monsters and resorting to chewing the shoulders of various classmates for food in the more boring parts of Physics. There is a lot of meat on a shoulder, see, and it's less embarassing than trying to eat their stomach or derriere. (not derrier, as we're all girls).

Somehow my hands seem to be slowly morphing into useless lumps of flesh. They no longer fully obey my commands. I order "Move!" And yet they just sit there. A true mistoire of nature (to rhyme with histoire). As replacing them with chopsticks would make it increasingly hard to type, I say:

Banana, please. You have passed this level, and must retreat to the land where the Bong Tree grows. There you shall hear several whimsical zen sayings that will annoy you a lot. This is slightly before the zen masters come at you with large picks.

We masters of zen do that.